Destination Hesitation
by sh0tt d0wn
Summary: An epic one-shot alternative ending to the DQ series which I would say swings through a variety of different genres; from intensely angsty to flippantly humorous to profoundly romantic and finishes with a scandalous plot twist that somehow seems valid. It is the story of the difficult but inevitable goodbye. (Also my first ever fanfic that I've deemed fit to publish). Enjoy!


Jasmine lingered in hesitation by the exquisite palace gates through which she would soon make her final exit final exit. She had made a choice and there was no stopping her. But somehow, even though she wanted desperately to be free of this sterility and to galivant around in the forests again, she couldn't help but think it wasn't supposed to end this way. It certainly would not be as easy as she first thought. To be fair though she had tried not to pay any heed to the alternative as she knew only that she could not bear to remain in such a bleak place so saturated with aristocratic conventions. It'd surely driver her to insanity. Jasmine would refuse to bother herself with the cost of her decision right now… if she could avoid it.

Alas, it seemed someone saw fit to deprive her of this reckless luxury.

Lief ran at full speed towards her, breathing laboriously as he called out, "Jasmine! Wait, don't leave."

Jasmine, with her back turned, squeezed her eyes shut for a moment in a fruitless effort to restore her composure for she felt dangerously close to yielding. At last she turned to face him. "No Lief, there is no way around it. We cannot see each other any longer and whatever you were about to say, I will not hear it. To say it out loud will only make this harder." There was no mistaking the shake in her voice.

Lief looked at her imploringly, with pain etched on his face, tears welling in his eyes and stayed silent as she asked him to.

Jasmine attempted to reason, as much to convince herself as to explain to him. "Please Lief, understand me when I say it is no use. You are not making this easy for me. You are the King of Deltora and I'm a wild girl who belongs in the forests. We both knew this day was going to come sooner or later… and I am afraid, if I leave it any later, neither of us will have the strength to do what has to be done. I um…" Jasmine's voice started to tremble with emotion and she cast her eyes down to regain her composure. Lief waited patiently for her to resume, fighting back his own tears and he did not dare speak for he knew that nothing he wanted to say would help. He squeezed Jasmine's hand to let her know he understood.

When Jasmine spoke again, there were depth and meaning to her voice and her words were carefully thought out. She no longer had the heart to berate him and changed her tack to one of gratitude. "Thank you Lief. I did things with your encouragement that I could not have hoped to be capable of and your friendship means more to me than I can convey to you. I know it will be hard to be away from you for we have been estranged for weeks already, with your duties to Deltora taking priority… as they must. And it is for the best that I do not return here, for I do not belong in a Palace any more than Barda belongs on the dancefloor." A glint of mirth returned to Lief's face and Jasmine instantly regretted meeting his eyes for there was no way she could go on much longer without dissolving into tears.

"The truth is Lief, I am not the same wild girl who almost took the cloak off your back and left you for dead in the forests all that time ago and I have you to thank for that. You braided my hair when I wanted it cut off and went to my defence when I did nothing to deserve it. You had faith in me. You had faith in the triumph of good. You showed me that there is almost always another way. But this time… There is no other way."

The final five words took effort to speak and Jasmine's vision blurred with tears, which spilt hot and fast down her rosy cheeks and she gasped for air. She felt Lief's strong arms envelope her and she lay her head on his heaving chest, inhaling his metallic musk. "I… Lief… don't let go."

Jasmine was contradicting what she had spent the last few minutes saying. She was coming apart in his arms; and even if she had demanded the opposite, Lief did not think he could let her go.

"Jasmine…" said Lief with fervour as he tucked a lose strand of hair behind her ear. "I know it is not a help, but I will never say it if not now." Lief loosened his embrace. His eyes bore into hers now, determined resolve replacing the hopeless glaze they formerly held. "Jasmine of the forests, I need you to know that you will be on my mind when the sun sets each night over the pine trees. I will not ever forget the insolent brilliance of your eyes or your stubbornness or our arguments over nothing at all that you always seemed to win; and never will I stop wondering how you are because… Because I love you."

Jasmine drew breath and exhaled sharply and before she could stop the words from escaping her mouth she replied in a whisper, "I love you too Lief… There never has been, and nor will there ever be, anyone else for me. I will never forget you, Lief of Del."

Jasmine tilted her chin up to meet Lief's gaze and she saw in it reflected, the deep, deep love that had developed between them without either's permission. The love that, until now, had been carefully concealed behind two sets of eyes out of a tragic combination of respect, fear, obstinacy and denial. In this moment, the mist was dispelled, and they saw through this haze of excuses to the mutual fiery passion at its core.

Lief lifted her worn hand to his lips, maintaining this vital eye contact from which he drew the strength to let go of his Jasmine. He bowed down to kiss it sorrowfully. Changing his mind, Lief then pulled her closer and brushed his lips over hers, tenderly and with restraint. Jasmine's eyes flitted shut and she pressed herself against the length of his body, leaning into his kiss. Lief licked at the tear tracks that had made their way down her face. She nipped and sucked at his neck below his ear until she drew blood and he moaned in dual pleasure and pain.

"Loving you is torture Jasmine, why must you hurt me so?"

"Because I am a pain in the neck," She whispered huskily. "And this is the only chance I have to embarrass you in front of Barda and your mother; even if I cannot be there to see it."

Lief snickered affectionately and lightly kissed her forehead. "What about Doom?"

"Do not worry Lief, for he already knows. I confided in my father about wanting to return to the forests; about how anxious and out of place I feel within the palace and about… well, about you Lief and how leaving the palace of Del means leaving you. He, of course, can take leave on occasion and visit me, but such a visit is both beneath a King and futile, for you must produce an heir and I cannot be the one to bear your children."

Lief looked forlornly into the distance over her head and let this inevitability settle. It wasn't long however, before a glint of hope returned to his eyes. "I suppose it would be rather tasteless of me to ask if you'll be my mistress. But someday I'll make that futile trip into the forests and search through the thicket to find you. And when I do, I will come as Lief of Del and I'm afraid I won't be quite so restrained as my position right now necessitates. Just you wait."

Jasmine's eyes gleamed through the tears that brimmed them. She smiled at the bold absurdity of his enticing proposition, laced her fingers around the back of his neck and buried her face in his shoulder. "Well… It seems there is always another way then. But I don't envy the woman who will someday produce your heir for she will also be burdened with your prescribed nobility and the strictures of the palace. I can't believe I have somehow escaped those bonds. Make sure to treat her well."

Lief nodded. "Personally, I don't see the appeal, yet my advisor tells me there are plenty who've expressed an interest. He busied himself fastening his cloak around her petite and shivering form. "I'd better make sure you get what you came for now hadn't I," he remarked cheekily, in reference to the way they'd met.

Jasmine's eyes brightened still, and she blushed in the moonlight. "How appropriate that your parting words are those with which I intend to greet you upon our next encounter."

Backing away slowly to catch the priceless look on his face, she dropped a brief curtsey for ironic effect and darted away.


End file.
